Going with the flow...

Hello world :) For starters, I wanted everyone to notice at the top of this blog I added a "subscribe by email" thing so that you can see when I post updates automatically. Some of you get an email every time I create a post already but that's because either you figured out on your own how to "follow" me or I added you myself.
NOW before I go into my date for surgery, I thought I'd share a funny story so I'm splitting this into two blog posts. It's probably a TMI (too much info) moment but I thought that this might be something other women going through what I'm going through might be able to relate to (actually if you have a vagina at all you'll probably get where I'm coming from lol).

OMG I can't believe they have period clipart.

If you're a women, and you're still enjoying that wonderful gift mother nature gives you every month, then I'm sure you've had that dreading moment. The other morning I woke up, hit the snooze button, and as I'm going back to sleep, I start to feel this wetness. At first I thought oh crap, I'm having one of those dreams. C'mon, you know those dreams....those dreams where you have to pee so badly that (in your dream) you're rushing to the bathroom to pee but in real life you're actually peeing. No? You haven't had one of those dreams? Strange. :) I have..I mean not recently...but ya know....ANYWAYS it was that moment when you wake up and go OH CRAP I STARTED and it's all over the sheets and big freakin mess and the first thing that goes through your mind is oh crap how do I hide this from my boyfriend sleeping next to me and oh my god did I get it on him. So luckily for me, West got up, didn't notice and rushed out the door for work giving me a special window to throw everything in the laundry. Now laundry is a chore I absolutely despise. Hate it. HATE IT. As I got in the shower, it dawned on me that I didn't actually mind starting the laundry this morning. I didn't actually mind that I started in the middle of the night and made a huge mess. I didn't even mind that it meant for the next 4 days I was going to be in period hell. Do you know why I didn't mind? Because for once in the last few weeks something in my body is actually operating as designed. I actually took comfort in knowing my period came, my womanly functions were working and not only were they working but they were right on time, to the day. Something in my body doesn't hate me for once, and I actually feel like I had control over a bodily function. It was almost liberating. It will probably be the only time in the history of my menstruating life that I will actually look forward to my period and cherish it like a gift.

Oh, and I've been meaning to share with all ya'll some funny things I've learned about breast implants lately.

1. Did you know that all breast implants have serial numbers? When you get your "devices installed" as they call it in the paperwork you have to fill out a card with all your information on it including the serial number of your breast implants and send them in to the manufacturer to keep on file. I guess if I get murdered, thrown in a ditch somewhere, fingers cut off, teeth removed, no way to ID me, then they can call up the manufacturer of my implants and ID me that way LOL
2. Did you know you can buy a warranty on your "devices"? Your implants come with a card you send in just like a TV or a DVD player. You fill out the paperwork, put the serial number down and pay $100 to get a 10 year warranty on the implants. That way if something happens to them in ten years, the company will cover SOME of your medical expenses (not all but SOME lol)
3. Breast implants feel cold/hot and react to weather. So, when I'm sitting in the 120 degree Vegas sun, my silicone is going to heat up a lot quicker than the rest of my body and hold that heat in, same with the cold so I'm thinking when it is 120 degrees outside, I'm going to put my boobs in a freezer before going out. It'll be like internal AC!!